


Merry Christmas, Kitty Levi

by Asexual_Ravioli



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Animal Traits, Animals, Cat/Human Hybrids, Eruri Secret Santa 2017, Fluff, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Gen, Modern Era, cat!levi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-24
Updated: 2017-12-24
Packaged: 2019-02-19 21:14:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,206
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13132353
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Asexual_Ravioli/pseuds/Asexual_Ravioli
Summary: On a cold winter's night, Erwin finds a bizarre gift in the trash. A year in the life of Erwin and his Levi-cat.





	Merry Christmas, Kitty Levi

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Kittyboo98](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kittyboo98/gifts).



> For the Eruri Secret Santa. Dedicated to kittyboo8015 on tumblr!

Erwin pulled his coat around him tighter and stepped into the darkened alleyway. A cold wind whipped at his back. The small mewling sound that had drawn him behind his garage continued. It sounded like a cat. Or a baby.

He approached the cluster of garbage cans, one of which had been knocked over. There. The sound came from there. He got on his knees and peered inside. A small dark shape shifted, growing quiet. There was nothing to do but reach inside and…and a sharp set of teeth sunk into Erwin’s ungloved hand. He wrenched his hand out and examined it in the dark. He didn’t think he was bleeding. He reached into the garbage can again, more slowly this time. Erwin felt the warmth of the animal’s body and closed his hands around it. The thing gave a small shriek but otherwise did not struggle in Erwin’s hands.

Erwin pressed it to his chest. In the dark he saw the silhouette of its ears. So it was a cat after all. He hurried through the snow, around the corner, and dug the key to his house out of his pocket as he held the cat in one arm.

“Myeeeeh,” the cat whined.

“Just a minute,” Erwin said and unlocked the front door.

Once the warmth from the house rushed out at them, the cat leapt from his arms and walked inside through the foyer, tail twitching. Erwin turned on the lights. “What the hell?”

The little cat sat like a human might, in the middle of the floor with its chubby little legs stretched out. Except…it had the head of a human (minus its black cat ears) and the body of a human (minus its twitching black tail). It was a little less than the size of a toddler, naked except for the long black hair on its head which matched its large ears. It licked at its hand, pausing with its tongue out as Erwin knelt next to it. The thing glared up at him in suspicion with its cat’s eyes, pupils huge in the darkness. Erwin grabbed an ear and tugged.

“Tch,” the thing said and batted Erwin’s hand away. “Uh. Sorry,” Erwin said and reached around to gently tug its tail.

It hissed and narrowly missed biting Erwin again. But Erwin grew more daring, picking it up below its armpits and holding it at arm’s length. The thing looked sullen, its head bent low as he glared up at Erwin, all its limbs limp.

“At least I know you’re a boy,” Erwin said. The thing let out a hissing sigh. It sounded almost human. Erwin put him down. “I’m Erwin,” he said, at a loss for what to do. Might as well introduce himself. He held out his hand in greeting. The thing stared at it for a moment, then settled its hand on Erwin’s palm for just a moment.

He watched as it crawled on hands and knees, examining the breadth of the foyer. It reached a dying potted plant and surprised Erwin by standing up. Almost toppling, he grabbed onto the lid of the pot and righted himself. Sniffing at the shriveled leaves, he tentatively chewed at them, squinting as he bit. He then spat in disgust, rubbing his hand over his tongue to dislodge the taste.

Erwin didn’t know what to do. He went into the kitchen to find something to feed the cat…boy. Rustling through his cupboards, he at last found a can of chicken noodle soup. The cat part of him might not like it, but maybe the boy would. Erwin dumped the food into a pot and heated it up. In the next room, he heard the sounds of what must have been books falling off his shelves. He peeked into the living room. Yep. The catboy was halfway up the bookshelf. Surely it wasn’t safe. Erwin rushed at him, plucking him off the shelf. The catboy struggled in his hands as Erwin carried him into the laundry room. He flicked on the light and set the thing in the corner. Now more curious about the new room than upset, the catboy explored the space between the washer and dryer. Erwin took the opportunity to close the catboy inside.

A muffled _mrrrrow_ sounded from the other side of the door. Erwin went back to the kitchen. He tested the soup. Hot enough. Ladling it into a bowl, he wondered at what to do next. Should he tell someone? No. He shuddered at the thought of scientists picking the thing apart. Even Hanji…

He heard a thud. Carrying the bowl of soup quickly, he set it by the laundry room door. Another thud. He swung the door open. A very angry catboy came out, but paused when he saw the soup. Cocking his head, he gave the bowl a sniff, then settled down to eat. The soup was too hot for his tongue. He shook his head to get rid of the pain. Erwin took the opportunity to put the bowl inside the laundry room. This caused the catboy to stare at him, blinking slowly. He went into the laundry room warily. Erwin shut the door quietly and grabbed his car keys.

 

A baby store. A store for babies. That’s where Erwin found himself, among pregnant women and their husbands hastily purchasing cribs and diapers. Erwin went to the clothing section where some toddler stuff was on display. Pink and blue onesies: adorable, but probably not the catboy’s style. Leafing through them, he pulled out something in the back that might be perfect. The yellow onesie was covered with pink smiling cat faces.

He carried it to the cashier, an elderly lady who held the onesie stretched before her.

“For your daughter?” she asked.

“…Yes,” Erwin said. “It is.”

He left before she asked him to show her pictures or something, heading for the pet store next.

 

The house was quiet. It always was. Erwin was almost used to it, having lived alone in it for a few years now. Hesitantly, he opened the laundry room door. At first, he couldn’t find it. The room had become a mess—more so than before—with the crates of unwashed clothes tipped, towels and shirts thrown about. Then, Erwin saw him. A cute little butt and legs sticking out of a pair of his Levi’s jeans. Erwin pulled at the legs of the jeans, earning a sharp retort from the catboy who sleepily pulled his head out, blinking at Erwin in his post-sleep confusion.

“You like them?” Erwin asked. “Should I call you Levi, then?”

“Mew,” he sat flatly.

“Okay. Levi. I got some things for you.” He put the plastic bags between them. Levi pawed at them, sniffing and making noises of amusement. Erwin first pulled out the onesie. “This is for you to wear, Levi.” Levi rubbed his cheek against the soft material and closed his eyes.

Now came the hard part.

“I’m putting it on you.”

Levi seemed to understand, tensing and backing away toward the dryer where he could hide. Erwin grabbed him with one arm, holding the onesie in the other.

“Now stay still,” Erwin said, but Levi was flailing wildly, hissing his discontent. After several minutes, Erwin had gotten Levi’s feet shoved into the onesie when he discovered he had put it on backwards.

“Sorry. Let’s try this again.” The fight was leaving Levi, his struggles becoming less animated as he resigned himself to being dressed. When the onesie was on, he fell out of Erwin’s grasp and onto his butt (his tail pulled through the flap on the back). He looked down, pinching the fabric on his chest, not sure what to make of it. He gave the sleeves a few pre-emptory licks, smacking his lips when the fuzz came off in his mouth.

Erwin rustled in the other bag he’d brought. Levi stood slowly, placing his hands on the floor until he could stand, then tottered over on unsteady, onesied feet. He fell to his belly, very interested now in pawing at the plastic bag, ignoring the cat toys Erwin now held.

“Look, Levi,” Erwin said, shaking a stick with a feather on it in Levi’s face. Levi batted at it, not to play, but to get it out of his face. He proceeded to roll and pull the bag onto his belly, clasping it with hands and feet. Erwin sighed and put the toys down. He attempted to take the bag away before Levi suffocated, only succeeding in pulling it up a little bit as Levi held it with all the force in his tiny body.

“Myaaah!”

“No, Levi. Give it to me. No!”

“Neeerooooo!! Neerooooow!”

Erwin paused. “No,” he said gently.

“Neeeoooo,” Levi said, relaxing his hold on the bag but not giving up.

“No,” Erwin said again, in what he hoped was an encouraging way.

“Noooaaaa…”

“Very good, Levi!” Erwin said and laughed. Levi stared up at him perplexedly and let go of the bag. Erwin took the bags and the empty soup bowl, leaving the door open for Levi. If he could learn to say “no,” Erwin reasoned that he could soon teach him not to mess up the bookshelves. Levi tore out of the laundry room, scampering on hands and feet. Erwin marveled at the sight, at last struck fully by the strangeness of his new friend.

“No no no,” Erwin said as Levi began his climb up the bookshelf.

“Naaaoaanaaonao.”

That night, Erwin put Levi to bed in the guestroom. He looked so small there, staring at Erwin with the covers up to his chin.

“Uh. Goodnight, Levi. Merry Christmas,” Erwin said.

“Mrow.” Levi shut his eyes.

Erwin had a hard time falling asleep that night. It was quite a strange turn of events. When he woke up in the morning, it was to Levi’s butt in his face. Sometime in the night, Levi had left his own bed and curled up on Erwin’s chest.

 

A few weeks later, Levi had already outgrown his onesie. He was maybe the size of a five-year-old now, no longer chubby, but rather thin. Erwin bought him suitable clothes. Most of the shirts had cats on them (Erwin found them in the girl’s section, but he wouldn’t tell Levi that).

Erwin spent his days working at the office, waiting to go home to Levi. Waiting to sit on the couch with a glass of wine and a book in his lap, with Levi’s head blocking his book, asking for a scratch behind the ears. This is where Erwin found himself on a quiet winter’s night. The book was dreadful, so Erwin didn’t mind Levi’s need for attention. He rubbed Levi’s head. Levi shut his eyes and hummed.

“Erwin,” he said without opening his eyes. “Erwin.”

This is new. Erwin supposed he remembered his name from when he first introduced himself. He was more and more surprised by his intelligence each day.

“Levi,” he said warmly.

“I Levi.”

“That’s right,” Erwin said proudly. “You’re Levi.”

“No, no,” Levi said, jerking his head up and staring at Erwin. “ _I,_ Levi! I!”

Erwin chuckled. “Yes, Levi. I.”

“Good,” Levi said and curled into a ball on Erwin’s lap. It wasn’t long before he was snoring softly.

 

Levi loved television. In fact, he was obsessed with it. Erwin had to make sure he wouldn’t watch at all hours. Many times he’d woken in the middle of the night to find Levi in the dark, sitting in the eerie bluish glow of the TV.

“Levi,” Erwin said, rubbing his eyes. “Your bedtime was hours ago.”

Levi didn’t turn from the TV which was tuned to Animal Planet.

“But what makes a tiger a tiger? And a human…human?” the TV said.

Levi twitched his tail. “Human…” he said gently.

 

Months passed, and spring arrived. Erwin worked in the garden out front, tending to snapdragons, orchids, and red roses, all of which he learned were safe for cats. As his hands worked the soil, he glanced up to see Levi peeking over the couch whose back faced the window. Levi’s eyes grew wide upon seeing Erwin looking at him. He ducked down, out of sight (it was their rule that Levi would never stand in the window, lest he be seen by passersby). Erwin laughed and shook his head, patting the earth around a new bunch of orange snapdragons.

When he came inside, one hand behind his back, he saw Levi peeking out the window longingly, mostly hidden by the couch. He turned to Erwin, his ears down, a frown on his face.

“I have something for you,” Erwin said.

Levi immediately perked up, rolling off the couch, landing in a squat, springing up to run to Erwin. He sniffed all around him, Erwin still hiding the gift. Levi clung to the arm that hid the flowers, getting lifted into the air in the process.

“Okay, okay,” Erwin relented, laughing. Levi pried the flowers from his grip. He sniffed and smiled, then stuffed an entire snapdragon in his mouth.

“You like that?” Erwin asked.

Levi nodded, the happiest Erwin had ever seen him. A single orange petal fell from his mouth.

 

“Is this as big as you’re gonna grow?” Erwin asked one fall morning. Levi had gotten between Erwin and the waffle iron, and Erwin saw that Levi’s height hadn’t changed recently, his head only reaching Erwin’s chest. Levi turned from his enraptured staring at the waffle iron and glared at Erwin.

“No,” he said, sounding like a teenager.

Erwin smiled and took the finished waffles out, piling them on two plates and setting them on the table. Levi remained frozen in his place.

“Come eat, Levi.”

“No.”

Erwin sat. “It’s chocolate chip, Levi. You don’t want any?”

“No!”

“What’s wrong? That you’re not gonna get taller?”

Levi glared at the ground, shifting his feet.

“Listen, Levi. Most cats don’t grow that big. And whatever you are…”

“I human!” Levi snapped.

“…Of course, Levi,” Erwin said in surprise. “But you understand you’re different from humans. That’s why you can’t go out, remember? Now sit down and eat.”

Levi walked quickly to the table and swiped his own plate to the floor. It shattered with an awful sound.

“Levi!”

He ran down the hall. Erwin followed. He found Levi under his bed. When Erwin reached out to him, Levi hissed.

“Levi,” Erwin said. “Of course you’re human. Just like me. But a little different. That’s what makes you special. There’s no one like Levi.”

With the limited space under the bed, Levi turned his face to Erwin.

“I Levi?”

“Yes.”

Levi wiped at his eyes, and Erwin realized there were tears there.

“Now come out of there. We can share my waffles.”

Levi climbed out, and Erwin put his hands on his shoulders. Levi looked up at him, eyes sparkling.

“I love you, Levi.” Erwin gave him a kiss on the head. When he pulled away, he saw Levi frowning, a blush dusting his cheeks.

“Thank,” Levi said.

 

Levi was taking a particularly long time in the shower that morning. Normally his showers lasted a half hour. Pretty extravagant, Erwin thought. Still, Levi always came out happy, so Erwin didn’t force the issue. This time, however, Erwin almost wondered if Levi was okay in there. Maybe he was just enjoying the hot water: it was one of the coldest days so far this fall, and Levi hated to be cold.

“Levi?” Erwin called.

Immediately the door opened. Levi stood dressed in a pink woolen hat, sunglasses, one of Erwin’s winter coats (far too big for Levi), jeans, and a pair of Erwin’s shoes (also too big).

“What…what is this?” Erwin asked. He had never known Levi to play dress-up.

“Out,” Levi said, bouncing slightly on his feet. “Out, out!”

“You want to go out,” Erwin said, dumbfounded. The idea never occurred to him. It was far too risky.

Levi tugged on Erwin’s hand, leading him toward the door. Erwin saw that Levi’s tail was hidden in the jeans.

“Wait, Levi,” Erwin said. “We have to think about it.”

“No think,” Levi said, still pulling. “Only out.”

Erwin laughed. “I _have_ to think about it. I’ll give you an answer tomorrow, okay?”

Erwin mulled it over. After work the next day, he bought Levi a dark green coat in his size, and a suitable pair of gym shoes. When he got home, Levi seized on his shopping bags.

“Out!” Levi said happily, pulling the coat around him. He ran off to his room, putting on his pink hat and Erwin’s sunglasses.

“Wait a minute, Levi. Let’s lay some ground rules.” He had to stop Levi as he hastily dressed. Levi looked up at him. “You can’t take off your hat. Or your sunglasses. You probably shouldn’t talk to anyone. No meowing either. And don’t leave my sight.”

Levi nodded.

“Where do you want to go?”

“Mall,” Levi said immediately. “Go mall.”

Erwin inhaled. That was a lot of people. He sighed. “Okay, Levi. We can go to the mall.”

When Levi was fully dressed, they went out to the car. Levi was shivering when they got in.

“Cold?”

“Cold cold,” Levi said, bouncing in his seat. Erwin buckled him in. Levi kept looking around, pressing his face to the window. Erwin started up the car. The heated seats kicked on. Levi gasped.

“Butt!” Levi said.

Erwin laughed.

They got to the mall in no time. Erwin took Levi’s hand before he could dash off across the parking lot. Levi frowned but ultimately shrugged, accepting Erwin’s chaperoning.

Levi took him straight to the food court, running up to the shop that sold big cinnamon pretzels. He leaned as far as he could over the counter, sniffing loudly. The boy behind the counter looked like he was being accosted.

“Uh…”

“Food,” Levi said and clapped a hand over his mouth, remembering his vow of silence. He linked his arms with Erwin’s and hid his face in Erwin’s side.

“Two cinnamon pretzels, please,” Erwin said.

Levi practically inhaled his, then ate half of Erwin’s. Erwin was just glad to see Levi so happy. They walked through the mall, Levi dragging them into nearly every shop. They saw candles, sunglasses, lingerie. Levi found a girl’s store that sold lots of cat-themed stuff.

“Erwin!” Levi shouted at one point. “Erwin!”

“What is it, Levi?”

“Cat…hat.”

Levi held up a bright yellow winter hat with cat ears on the top.

“Oh. Do you want that?”

Levi nodded.

Erwin purchased it for him. Levi led him to a bathroom where he changed into it right away.

“Cute,” Erwin said.

Levi rolled his eyes (where did he learn that?).

“Sorry,” Erwin said. “I meant cool.”

Levi nodded curtly. Just as they left the men’s room, Erwin heard someone call out to him.

“Oh, no,” he said. “Levi…”

“Hey, Erwin!” Hanji said and slung an arm around Erwin’s shoulders. “Who’s this? Your boyfriend?”

“No!” Erwin said. “This is my…nephew, Levi.”

“Hi, Levi,” Hanji said. “I didn’t know Erwin had a nephew. Or siblings to give him nephews.”

Levi stared at her without saying anything.

“He only speaks French,” Erwin lied.

“Oooh,” Hanji said. “J'aime le français. D'où venez-vous, Levi?”

Levi looked to Erwin pleadingly.

“He speaks a rare dialect. Of French,” Erwin said. “It’s more like Latin than anything.”

“I see,” Hanji said. “My Latin is a little rusty but…”

“Oh, look at the time!” Erwin said theatrically, pulling on Levi. “We have to go. See you around, Hanji!”

“Oh. Okay! Tell Levi I like his hat.”

“Okay!”

When they got to the car, Erwin’s hands shook. “Never again,” he said. “We can go to the park next time. But not the mall. Too many people.”

Levi nodded, then muttered, “Sad.”

“I’m sorry, Levi. I’ll make it up to you. I promise.”

 

As much as Levi loved television, he was even more in love with Pokémon. He’d seen every season of the show and every movie. He now owned most of the DVDs. As Christmas approached, Erwin kept this in mind.

Levi was inches from the screen, watching the Team Rocket speech for the millionth time. He could probably recite it by now.

Then, Levi sneezed.

“Don’t sneeze on the screen, Levi,” Erwin said from the couch.

Levi sneezed again. Then kept sneezing.

“Are you okay?” Erwin asked.

Levi turned to him and wiped his nose on his sleeve.

“Come here, Levi,” Now that he was really looking, Levi seemed a bit peaked, his face a bit pale, his eyes more tired. Levi got on the couch and Erwin touched his forehead. “You’re burning up. Better get in bed.”

“Poke,” Levi complained, pointing at the TV.

“No more Pokémon for right now. I’m gonna give you some aspirin and you can sleep for a while.”

Levi fell into Erwin’s lap, waiting to be carried to bed. Erwin obliged and tucked him into bed.

“I can put my old TV in here so you can watch from bed.”

Levi nodded and shut his eyes. It reminded Erwin of the first night Levi was here.

All the next day, Levi alternated between sleep and Pokémon. Erwin took his temperature often. When it got up to 103 degrees, he began to get worried. Levi was sleeping longer and longer. There was only one thing he could do…

 

“Thank you for coming over, Hanji.”

“No problem,” she said. “Now where is this cat?” Hanji was one of the best veterinarians in the city. Still, he wondered if she could handle this case.

“Well, the thing is…” Erwin said, unsure of how to go on. Then an idea struck him. “Hanji,” he said. “I need you to pinky swear on something.”

Hanji perked up. “It’s that serious?”

“Yes,” he said. “You have to swear you’ll tell no one about my…cat.”

Hanji stared at him for a moment. “Okay,” she said, holding out a pinky. “I promise.”

They linked pinkies, something they had taken very seriously since childhood. A pinky swear was law. Period.

They walked to the guestroom together, an episode of Pokémon still playing.

“So does this sick cat have like…three heads or some—” Hanji froze. “No,” she said. “Those are fake. This is a prank, right?”

“No.”

Levi was sleeping. Until Hanji tugged on his ear. Then she saw his angry cat eyes and it all devolved form there.

“My God,” she said. “What are you?”

Levi hissed. “Human,” he said icily.

Hanji nearly screamed. “It can talk!”

“It’s a boy,” Erwin said in the background.

“This is a marvel of science,” Hanji went on. “We have to contact—”

“No one,” Erwin said. “You swore,” he said, holding out his pinky.

Hanji sighed and looked at her own pinky. “Yeah. I did. Okay, let’s get this fever down.”

 

By the next day, Levi’s fever had receded with the help of Hanji’s prescriptions. Levi sat up in bed, allowing Hanji to talk at him.

“How old are you? Where did you come from?”

“Poke,” he said, leaning to try to see past Hanji who blocked the TV.

“Poke? Where’s Poke?”

“He wants to watch Pokémon, Hanji,” Erwin said.

“Oh. I can go now.”

“I don’t know how to repay you, Hanji.”

“Just let me visit Levi. Maybe run some tests for my own amusement?”

“Deal,” Erwin said. Levi looked less than pleased.

 

Christmas came quickly, the anniversary of Erwin meeting Levi. Therefore, Erwin dubbed it Levi’s unofficial birthday. He put up a tree this year that Levi loved to sleep under, warmed by the white lights. On Christmas Eve, Levi nestled amongst all his presents, sleepy soundly. Erwin wished he could take a picture, but he didn’t want to produce more evidence of Levi’s unique body. He carried Levi to bed.

“Santa’s coming tomorrow,” he said as he tucked him in.

“No real,” Levi muttered sleepily.

Erwin smiled. “You watch too much TV.” He ruffled Levi’s hair. “Good night, Levi.”

“Night.”

 

Levi dumped out his stocking, pawing through all the candy and cat treats.

“Don’t eat it all now, Levi. Open some presents.”

Levi pounced on his presents, finding clothes, toys, and something special Erwin hid far back behind the tree. Levi rotated the GameBoy Color in his hands, not sure what to make of it. He bit at its corner and sniffed it all around.

“Here,” Erwin said. “It’s Pokémon. Pokémon Red.” He turned it on. Levi’s eyes grew wide as he watched the opening graphics.

“POKE!”

“I’ll teach you how to play,” Erwin said.

Within an hour, Levi was playing independently, asking Erwin what certain words meant (his reading ability was still pretty low).

“Pika!” Levi shouted. “Erwin, PIKA!”

“Oh,” Erwin said, looking at the screen. “You already found a Pikachu. Those are kind of rare. You have to catch it now.”

“Pika,” Levi whispered, not taking his eyes off the screen until he caught it. “Pika, Erwin!”

“Good job, Levi!”

Levi beamed.

Erwin started to clean up the wrapping paper until the doorbell rang.

“Hanji,” Erwin said, opening the door. “What is…Oh, no,” he said.

“Surprise!” Hanji yelled, a kitten jumping from her arms.

“KITTY!” Levi screamed.

 

**Author's Note:**

> My tumblr is Erurink.tumblr.com
> 
> My writing tumblr is Erurink-is-writing.tumblr.com
> 
> Come visit any time.


End file.
